Great White Games/Pinnacle Entertainment Group

[flaminghat]

hello everyone...new blood obviously, and i apologize for starting off like this, but i've been working on a Hell on Earth 'story' (it's starting to look like it's gonna be pretty long) for quite a while now, and i thought i'd drop a line to all you Deadaphiles to see if anyone had any input.

it's set (so far) in northern New Mexico in 2094, where a lone cyborg named Charlie protects a small village of survivors, as he has been doing for a decade. all but the village elder and a fourteen year old girl are fearful of him, but the girl and his duty keep Charlie sane. however something buried in the irradiated rubble of Roswell is clawing its way to the surface, with the intention to gather an army to purge the Wasted West of what is left of humanity. and it wants Charlie.

the story, as it is so far, is on my WordPress site here: http://flaminghat.wordpress.com/. i have been working on it for a long time, but just started re-writing it, and only the first two chapters are the new stuff, the rest is old Tolkienesque 'Charlie wanders around the desert thinking thoughts of great depth while nothing happens' kinda crap and is there for historical record only. while the two new chapters are not exactly exciting, containing mostly character development and no action to speak of, i'd still like the opinions of any brave souls on the quality of the writing, if they think it does the game materials proud, whatever. trust me, if i ever manage to get over my block, there will be a great deal of carnage.

alright, well thanks to anyone who goes so far to even read my request, and double thanks to anyone who humors me and decides to take a peek at my wild ramblings, feedback left or no.

[Xaotiq1]

HELL YEAH! It's made of AWESOME! Any true fan of HoE who doesn't read this story is missing out. Keep it up, Flaminghat!

[Chezzo]

It's incredible, and totally could be published. It left me wanting more, but you're right, it does need something to happen.

Maybe Charlie's programming/manitou could take over and lead him somewhere else, and while he's away - the town gets attacked and seized.

I don't know if you even need to call it a Hell on Earth book (so far anyways), 'cept for the part about the Latin Alliance and the South. Right now it's just the brilliant beginnings of a post-apocalyptic novel.

I have never, in my entire life, eagerly anticipated the release of a RPG, nay a book, as much as Hell on Earth.
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[flaminghat]

thanks for the feedback, guys. i really appreciate it. as far as something happening, i have everything in my head as far as main events and basic structure, it's just getting the writing done that's a pain. the next chapter involves Charlie's first dream and quickly covers the period between when Charlie and Angel first meet up and the present. strange happenings then begin and action will ramp up sharply at that point. i don't want to spoil too much in case i do finish sometime. but to give you a hint, Chezzo...that's exactly what happens. damn me for being predictable.

i know the connection to Hell on Earth is vague right now as well, but it will become stronger as the narrative progresses, eventually tying into major events in the Wasted West. i could have just gone with generic post-apoloclyptica, but Hell on Earth has some qualities and some plot elements i wish to exploit, as i love the setting but have never had the opportunity to actually play it (my background is with original Deadlands).

again, thank you very much for your encouragement, and hopefully it will help get me over the hump and get the next chapter out soon.

[VonDan]

Yeah don't stop I once got 4 chapters of JEDI CHICKS done in 4 weeks and then a drunk room mate moved in and I have not finished another chapter since 1998

[flaminghat]

Chapter I:III now ready for human eyes, entitled 'Heaven'. Charlie's dreams bring him closer to who he was before he became a can and background is wrapped up, bringing us next to the story proper. Hope you saved up on fuzzy feelings, because you will need them.

also, semi-related note...someone tried to send me a PM, or so an email i received indicated, and when i tried to read it, it did not exist. just FYI to whoever.

anyway, hope y'all enjoy the new Chapter, and...seriously...it gets worse. a lot worse.